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#12 Are You Shure About That?

2012-02-14T09:23:00.000-08:00

Singleton's Day

2012-02-13T08:55:00.000-08:00

I once had a Valentine,
whose eyes had a smile
and a grin so darn wide

This concept of love
took me utterly by surprise
what was it, exactly,
to make stubbornness stand aside

As the law of gravity dictates
what goes up must come down
I flew too high and lost control
Then crashed tumbling, tumbling down

short-lived and sudden
it was over, in a blink
And so the next Valentine's,
I was buying my own drinks

From then on,
I was on my own
A singleton, a simpleton
A cranky old soul, simply alone

In time to come,
I learned more about love
Not just to Valentines
But to friends, and a little brother.

Without this trigger
It might have stayed a myth
That love truly is
God's greatest gift

So I raise my glass to God
And celebrate this time
May we all learn to love one another
And a happy Valentine's

#11 Down The Street

2012-02-13T08:53:00.000-08:00

#10 小狗

2012-02-09T07:56:00.000-08:00

#9 Mode Of Transport

2012-02-08T08:28:00.000-08:00

#8 Of Glee Fame

2012-02-07T08:26:00.000-08:00

My favourite character on the show.

#7 Sketchy Details

2012-02-06T06:59:00.000-08:00

Practice makes perfect. I'm practicing.

This Title Was Intentially Left Blank.

2012-02-04T07:57:00.000-08:00

iwanttoflytosomewherefarawayandlivethereforawhileuntilrealityhitsmethankyouverymuch.

#6 Kobe Bryant

2012-02-03T10:33:00.000-08:00

On court, he is magic.

#5 "Baby Faced Assasin"

2012-02-02T09:37:00.000-08:00

It's never easy to be a super sub, but Ole Gunnar Soljkaer makes it look easy.

#4

2012-02-01T06:55:00.001-08:00

#3

2012-02-01T06:11:00.000-08:00

Gets me away from it all.

我要把铁棒磨成针

2012-01-31T07:17:00.000-08:00

Drawing, shading and colouring is therapeutic.

I've Got A New Wacom Bamboo!

2012-01-30T07:40:00.000-08:00

And so am trying to practice drawing on it. May also be using it for editing as one director has told me it's much faster. Sorry for the ugly drawing, hopefully it'll will improve with time.

Thank you Charlene Su Jieying (must put full name :)) for your lovely gift!

Mustafa Centre

2012-01-29T09:21:00.001-08:00

As a night of furious discussions with the brother and parents during dinner drew to a close, the father decided to bring us to the only place still open to get the brother's watch in time for the start of his army daze tomorrow.

Mustafa Centre remains the only place where I'll get lost in, because nothing really make sense in there. From sports it jumps to toys, then hardware is right on top of the food section which is squashed on the middle floor. Or something like that. I find it rather amusing that every item is stacked on top of each other, limitless in quantity. It strips all brands down to what they really are- commodities. No frills, no glamour, just a lotta goods.

It also remains the best place to get props for production. I remember heading to mustafa at 7 in the morning 2 or 3 times just to get balloons for shoots. Or 10pm at night for drawing blocks and light bulbs.

Good for holding hands too, as you see all the Indian brothers clinging on to each other affectionately. Good for them la.

Love the place and all it's offerings. Beat that, NTUC.

It's Going to be a Long Year

2012-01-24T08:56:00.001-08:00

Right. The year of the dragon has ushered itself into our midst.

Ironically, except for superstitious parents who are aiming for dragon babies, the year will probably creep by without much fanfare. By next month, we'll probably forget which zodiac sin this year falls under as we return to our daily grind. Which, by all accounts, is fine by me.

But of course, it was a good break. So good, that I prayed for rest and it literally came in the form of a relative's bed which I slept on for 2 hours. While my mother caught up with her sisters, I caught forty winks.

I just love God's grace and how our prayers are always answered in special ways.

Dong Dong Dong Chiang!

2012-01-19T10:33:00.000-08:00

Is it Chinese New Year yet?

After a really hectic week- actually, am still having that hectic week, it is only Thursday night/ Friday morning after all- the Chinese New Year weekend doesn't feel like one.

Or rather, it feels even more kan cheong because it's the Chinese New Year weekend. No time to buy new shoes, or clean up the room, or even sleep, because it's just crazy.

Today, in the middle of quietness in the office (as everyone else was at home sleeping after an overnight shoot), I thought to myself as I was staring into Photoshop, "Is is how being a career woman feel like? To just work like crazy and not sleep and still have the energy to work the next day? To have no time to meet friends because of impending deadlines and assignments?"

"AM I GOING TO END UP ALONE BUT BE OKAY WITH IT?"

"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo...."

Jang! Jang! Jang! (Literal translation of dramatic music that's always in my edits.)

Well, maybe I'll get the answer tomorrow when I stare at Excel to build up my post production schedule for the year. YES FOR THE YEAR. Till 2013, siao.

Okay, almost done syncing music for the new iPod Touch, which I christian-ed (such a blasphemous use of this word in this case) "Nonsense" when I thought it couldn't be synced. In the words of a boyband of yore, N'sync-ed. Or rather, and..... sync-ed!

Time to crash. Bye bye bye. (At 3am in the morning I can still pun. I surprise myself.)

Grace Is A Beautiful Thing.

2012-01-15T09:17:00.000-08:00

This quote is very apt for me. But it's very random.

Today, after a "scary but punchy and impactful" service, Sheila was talking to her friend whom she'd just brought to church on the way to lunch.

The friend expressed his thoughts. "I felt that the church should emphasize on how the members should behave, on how to be good so that there is a clear idea of how Christians should conduct themselves, and be sinless and also, newcomers will work hard towards changing their hearts so that they can be ready to be Christians."

(something along those lines)

Sound logical right?

But God's grace defies logic.

Sheila answered,"That's where you are wrong. The thing about being a Christian is that we're all sinners. Only after we accept Jesus as our Lord and Saviour, then we are able to change, because He can then mould us and change us inside. If we were to do good works on our own in order to go to heaven, wouldn't that be the same as the basis of every other religion?"

That reminded me of Grace. His Grace.

When I just started out in my spiritual walk, my walk was slow. I wasn't anywhere near Him, and I had all the wrong ideas. My heart was in the wrong places and my mind was preoccupied. I was a sinner in my first year as a Christian, and I still am now, for there are so many traps and so many things of the world that still distracts me.

My non-believer friends asked me, "Why do you still follow Christ even though you've done things totally un-biblical, condemnable, wrong?"

"Because", it flowed out quite fast, without thinking,"even when I abandoned Him, He has never abandoned me. He showed me favour at work, He gave me opportunities, He helped me survive everything thrown at me, and he takes away my fear."

"He has never abandoned me."

Now tell me, how beautiful this thing Grace is? It's always there, for everyone to take and it's free. It's been paid for in blood. And it is enough for all men.

So, knowing that the Lord knows me and loves me for all my flaws and my weaknesses, it's my turn to learn how to love Him too.

"When we come to worship
bow down and pray
may the light of Jesus
anoint us each day"

With slightly deeper wallets comes great responsibility.

2012-01-13T08:30:00.000-08:00

Okay, I admit.

I'm tiptoeing between the line of being a slightly indulgent shopper and a complete shopaholic.

I just busted the bank with a new iPod touch and new clothes amounting to no less than $300 in 3 weeks. Ah, help me!

On one hand, I feel the need to treat myself at the thought of turning a quarter of a century this year. Plus, the Chinese New Year tradition dictates that one should wear new clothes on the first day of spring.

On the other hand, wah lao! No savings already ah girl!

But every girl's clothes has a silver lining (pun alert!). Mine is that I have one sister to share them with. Granted, she's shorter, skinner and recently overjoyed because her boobs are much bigger (good for her), but well, she still can fit into my clothes. So, not so bad la, hor? One top, 2 people share. That makes good economic sense, if I say so myself.

I'm really bullshitting my way through. HAHAHA.

Baptised.

2012-01-10T06:20:00.001-08:00

On the 8th of January 2012, I was baptised in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.

Video evidence showed that my face was one of fear and nervousness. My friends, who were in the chapel, giggled and laughed when they saw how different I looked as compared to Joyce, who was baptised right before me. She had a face of calmness, like she was well prepared and ready.

After the ceremony, people asked me, "Eh, what happened to you? How come you look so scared, like you want to smile but you don't want to smile?"

To tell the truth, I'm not really sure, but I believe that it has got something to do with my mother.

Rewind to 2 months ago.

When I finally obtained the baptism form, and told my parents, they had no intention of coming to my baptism. Thankfully, my big sister was very encouraging and she told me she'll come. She also successfully coaxed my small sister.

However, my mother insisted that she had no business to be there.

Okay, now back to the 8th.

I was very excited on that day, because I was able to show 1/3 of my family what I was up to, what my church looks like and what we do here. As the ceremony neared, a little girl seated next to me had her whole family in tow. Sisters, cousins, aunties, and of course, her family. They happily took pictures, and in order not to ruin their shot, I had to dodge a little.

While the rest of my friends came, my sister called to inform me they'll be running a little late. Can anot? She asked. She was afraid that at 1.45pm sharp, I'll be dunked and she'll miss it all.

"Can, can." I said. I was number 33. It will take a while before it'll be my turn.

After Praise and Worship, I was in overdrive. I turned around to search for my two sisters in the chapel. Hmm, where could they be?

Then I saw them. There wasn't just the 2 of them though, my very own mother was seated right there, just before the last row where Auntie Ruth and Uncle Tony sat. "Joyce!" I said, "My mother is here leh!"

It was surreal. Very overwhelming. And then my heart never stopped beating rapidly after that.

On the stage, about a few people before my turn, I was still looking up at my mother and my sisters, waving happily to them. I guess in hindsight, I should have taken some time to catch my breath, pray for calmness and peace during the baptism. But I didn't. I was so caught up in seeing my very own mother here, and feeling so blessed by His goodness that I became a small little jumpity excited child again.

In the pool, while the Elder Daniel Foo held my hands and said the lines, I was still full of excitment. "Don't breathe in the water, don't breath in the water," was all that was running through my mind. "Oh shucks, there's a videocam on my face and I'm live in front of the whole chapel. Where do I look, what do I do?"

And that explained the mystery of my perplexed face.

But when the moment came for the pastor to push me into the water, it happened fast. It was painless, relaxed, and all seemed peaceful again. It was His goodness rushing over me.

However, when I rose from the waters, I was again, my anxious self, trying to sweep my untidy wet hair away from my face, and wondering whether the seed has been planted in my family's heart.

At the end of the day, a baptism is a simple ceremony to acknowledge Christ and to identify with His death and resurrection. But my baptism was really special. God gave me a big gift that day and that was my family, whom I have longed to share Christ with.

Epilogue

As I followed my family to do their shopping afterwards, my mother said that she came because at first, she wanted to wait for my sisters at Orchard. However, my big sister convinced my mother that it'll be fast and she didn't have to do anything, just sit and watch the ceremony. My mother kept saying it was by chance that she was there, even though she told my sister that I would surely be very touched if she appeared.

I was very touched. And of course, did she really appear by chance? That's what she would like to think, but I think we all know who's really behind this.

Tomorrow.

2012-01-07T03:31:00.000-08:00

It's been a tiring day today with a full day of shoot.

But tomorrow, it'll be great.

After 2 years and 3 months of being in church, I'm taking a major step forward. Okay, it's actually not that major. Becoming a full time church staff or permanent overseas missionary, that's more major than what I'm doing now.

But still, each step gets us closer to God, and closer to Heaven.

So, I'm proud to announce that I will be getting baptised tomorrow!

To God be the glory.

Okay, now I need to rest. Very tired.

This Year Begins.

2012-01-03T06:56:00.001-08:00

Tonight,

We are young.

So let's set the world on fire,

We can burn brighter than the sun.

Twenty Twelve.

2012-01-01T01:21:00.000-08:00

I spent the first hour of 2012 watching fireworks from the 25th floor of an office building in Raffles Place.

Then the next hour relaxing in the office with Joyce, Cathy and boyfriend while waiting for the streets to clear.

After we finally thought that all is good at 2.30am, we stepped out from the building, only to see "zombies" at the sidewalk of every corner, every pavement, everywhere. They were all doing the same thing we wanted to do- stuck their hands out to flag for cabs. Some sat down, exasperated, some were dialing numbers like mad, and then there are the ones whose first few hours of 2012 were spent sleeping on the streets, dead drunk.

Our party of four went a big round and walked from Raffles Place to Chinatown, then to Central at Clarke Quay. There were people everywhere. Thank God for Cathy's brother, who come to pick us up in the cab snatching frenzy.

From the way these people partied, it seemed like they were partying like there's no tomorrow. Is 2012 going to be so hard?

I don't know, but I know it'll be good, as long as I take in my daily Bread and walk close with Him. It'll be great.

We Can Set The World On Fire (In 2012)

2011-12-27T08:22:00.000-08:00

But for now, let's take a look back at 2011, because I have a lot to be grateful for.

This bunch of friends.

7 years, I believe it has been, since I walked into SRJC and met this bunch of crazy people who taught me more than playing ball. They peeled off the "Loser" tag attached to my long brown skirt, and made me cool.

This year, I'm glad to say that I've rebounded back into the group, after getting lost in 2010. I'm back, yat-ches! Cheers to Moscato and more!

This bunch of friends.

We walked out of university and entered society with high dreams, hopes and ambition. Even though we are slowly weathered and stabbed by the intense winds of the working world, we still persevere.

With each meetup, we exchange stories in the workplace, what made us broke down and what made us stronger.

Ultimately, it's not the degree that makes the difference in your 5" by 9" cubicle. It's your attitude. I'm so proud of you girls (and one guy). We're still surviving!

This basketball team.

I need to admit, that everytime we put our hands together for a whoosh, I expect someone to shout "Nan Da" instead of "Jumpshot", since I've been so used to the alma mater, and also Yan's booming voice.

Somehow, I've managed to find a work-life balance through this little team that was put together by Esther. And we're playing better and better with each game.

Also, the Taiwan trip together was just what we needed for some good ol' bonding and relaxing.

People may get old, but passion never dies.

Kelly.

Kelly is so explosively different from any of my other friends because she was my colleague at WhyOhGee. Nonetheless, she's one of the most sincere and honest friend I've had. Actually she's more like an older sister, since she's a bit older. Okay, not really a bit. Haha. But still, a very precious friend who gave me 3 presents at one go.

Baptism.

In this picture, only 1 person was baptised. Guess who?

It was Wendy, on my left, who got baptised and her MP went for it. No kidding. Well, good news is, in 2012, the other 2 people in the picture are getting baptised too!

January 8th 2012, mark it guys.

Blading and Other Crazy Incidents That Only Happen When This Two Are Around

Amanda and Charlene are the perfect combi for the best times.

I learnt how to blade in 2011. In 2012, I'm going to pick up the guitar. Please pray for my musical talent, or rather, for my lack in it.

Adventures.

Diving, parasailing, flying fish. I went nuts during my holiday, and I went nuts with Leanne! More high-octane adventures okay?

Cell Group

Even though I always distract my cell group members by telling them that someone's using the bathroom every time they hear the pipes, they've not thrown me out of bible study yet.

This year, we all became closer to one another in Church. I'm really happy to say that going to church is a very pleasant thing to do, because you just feel that you're merely going home.

Working Life

When God opens a door, you know it's the right one.

Freedom

I tore away all the letters that no longer mean anything. I threw away everything that was a waste of my time. I no longer hide in the dark, I stand out in the light, with the Lord's courage.

And I'm free now.

My God

The slogan on top of my blog, "Refine Me, Lord, Through The Flame" is truly a slogan for the year. For I have gone through so many experiences, both good and bad, and I emerge more and more refined. I have been through humiliation, pride, jealousy, loss, but my God, my precious, fearful God has always been there for me every single day, refining and molding me.

2012 is going to be a tough year, but I'm not afraid.

Best. Christmas. Ever.

2011-12-25T21:46:00.000-08:00

Church with the besties.

On a private yatch with the besties.

This is the life.

Thank God for the friends and family who're always there for me.

Thank God for making me humble, down-to-earth, sometimes stupid but that just means there's so much to learn.

Merry Christmas and Happy Boxing Day, people!

The 2012 Motto

2011-12-21T08:06:00.000-08:00

向前看，向前走。

不掉头。

坚强地，向前。

前进！

有主引领我，2012 会是更好的！

Go and Dye.

2011-12-19T09:17:00.000-08:00

After my lil sister and my lil brother went to dye their hair as a mark of their freedom from their A levels, I got a little jealous and taa daa, guess who's the odd one out in the family now?

The answer is my dad. Everybody else has dyed their hair, including me who sold out my jet black thick bushy hair after 24 years.

In the past I had hoped for my mother to say "Eh! Go and die", and I would have promptly dyed my hair as a pun, but seriously, no mothers will tell their own kids to go and die. She never used that phrase, and so my hair remained black as a kettle.

It was an impulse choice anyway.

I was sitting down in the salon, waiting for my bi-monthly hair cut + treatment, when my hairstylist asked, "You want to dye your hair?"

"Ooooh.... what colour do you have?" I said, thinking that since Christmas is around the corner, why not try something new.

She took out a book, opened it and pointed it to one colour. "This one can be seen even when it's dark, but it's not so shocking, and I think you should be able to accept this."

Wah, she can read my rather conservative mind.

"What's a lighter shade?" I asked, thinking if I should be daring or not.

She flipped over a page and pointed at a colour that could be seen miles away, or that was what I thought it would do. "Ahhh.... I think I'll go with the first one." I said, once my eyes stopped bulging.

Hey presto, after 45 minutes of watching the lady put the dye on my hair, and then feeling that itch/ stinging sensation in the scalp, I see colour! In my hair!

It's really odd, actually. To see colour on your hair. Sorry, I'm a bit sua ku, but it was the first time I dyed my hair.

When I went home, my mother asked, "What colour is it?"

"Eh, I don't know." I answered. Some sort of brown, maybe.

When my dad saw me, he asked, "Who are you and what are you doing in my house?"

Well, I think a bit of change is refreshing, especially when you're 24 now and you're still hung up over the fact that only ntuc income and a travel insurance agent who is not your friend at all were the only ones to sms you Happy Birthday perhaps due to the fact that I set my birthday to be hidden on Facebook.

NTUC Income leh! Wah lau eh!

Aiyo, I'm so petty!

Ah, the older you get, the less presents you get too. But of course, I'm grateful for those who remembered without having to rely on FB, hello Yanyan who wished me way in advance and for those who gave me lil' presents here and there.

Thank you. Now let me remind myself that I had a great birthday in Taiwan to get over the fact that only NTUC Income and the travel insurance agent whom I bought the insurance for SHANGHAI wished me happy birthday.

Oh gosh, I can't stand myself.

But nevermind, I've dyed my hair already. Maybe I can stand the new me. Whoohoo!

Drive Of My Life

2011-12-14T09:01:00.000-08:00

Without a car, everywhere is bloody far.

Even worse now as they "su ka su ka" announce rising cab fares and increase in the number of peak hours. Everyone of my age is complaining, because everyone of my age take cabs like drinking water.

We work till after office hours and what happens when we have to rush from work to another commitment? Stick out that hand and flag lor, what to do? I take cabs 2 to 3 times a week after work, for basketball, for cell group, or for that faraway gathering somewhere not in town. Then, when we're all done unwinding for the day, gasp, it's 12am. What to do now? Stick out that hand and tell the uncle "Bishan st 13, thanks."

I know it's a really bad habit and it eats away what's left of the measly way-low sum they call my salary. Many a time Pearle and I seek to check into cab rehabilitation, and what turns out usually because a classic case of "The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak."

Sigh!

I think I was too pampared when I was in Uni, happily flashing about with the Toyota Rush as if there were no such thing as an oil crisis. These days, the only thing I flash about is my smile, accompanied by the question, "Did you drive today?"

See, I stooped so low that I described my own smile+question combo as a 下贱 attempt once to my teammates. Okay, the word 下贱 sounds quite harsh in hindsight, but I was like a hyena pouncing on every single potential car key-holding person.

I have a church friend, Cooper, who used to call me pretty every time I drove. I did the same, whenever he drove. Nowadays, most of the time, we're left disappointed by each other. "Aiyah? Why you not handsome today ah?"

Oh, SFB8119H, Anti You never seemed so far in my life before (except when I was in Year 1 and haven't gotten my license yet).

Now, Pearle, Sam, Xiu Hui, let's work out a way to get to the friendly game in Anti You without having to take a cab but yet not having to wake up that early....

Let's call the plan Mission Impossible: Ghost Cab Protocol.

Buddies.

2011-12-11T08:23:00.000-08:00

Me, Amanda and Charlene.

These two girls are one of the most precious sets of friends I can ever ask for.

When I went through the worst I've ever felt, they were there for me. When I needed to share my secrets, burdens lift up the moment I told them the story of my life. When I find myself in bouts of vulnerability, they knocked sense into me.

So when I say that I've truly matured this year, they can attest to that.

At the very least, I will think of consequences, since I am living with a slightly-more-bitter-than-sweet one now.

I love them so much. Also, they've taught me not to be so stingy.

Thank you God, for them.

:)

Three Things We're Grateful For

2011-12-09T09:06:00.000-08:00

During cell group today, Gillian asked all of us to write down 3 things that we're grateful for.

I didn't think it would be common, but quite a few of us wrote that we're so glad that all of us are much closer than before, and we're more like friends now. I had the same sentiments as well.

It seemed like yesterday that it was my first few times in cell group, awkward, quiet and hiding behind Joyce and Felily.

Somehow, over the course of this year, I've began to find my voice within this cell group, become more open and join in the fun.

This is truly one thing to be grateful for.

Next thing to be grateful for, my job.

In a place where most don't last 2 or 3 weeks, I've managed to survive for 11 months and counting.

And a fact that overwhelms me is that I set out to be an editor in mind, and now I've a few episodes out on tv, all in only 1 year.

Truly, all we have to do is to boldly ask and He will provide.

The third thing is my family.

We have reconciled. After 10 years. Because of a piece of A Level notes that fell into the toilet bowl. It's amazing, and it is one burden off my heart.

It's really important to count our blessings, and see the power of God working in us. Many times, I thought I've failed, and I thought I wouldn't make it through the tough days in the office, but I did, and I gained so much favour from the bosses.

He's always here with me.

那些年，我们一起去台湾打球的女孩

2011-12-06T06:49:00.000-08:00

As I was on the court panting, with my throat burning from the thin air, it felt incredible.

There I was, in Taipei, playing against 中华电信, who are the 3rd placed professional basketball team.

It was nothing short of a privilage, a blessing.

And also a fantastic birthday present.

Never mind we got thrashed, never mind their average height was the height of our 2 tallest players, never mind that out of so many layups I only got 1 in, never mind that we only had 7 players for the game. It was still so worth it, so memorably and precious in my heart.

Most precious birthday present ever!

Happy Overseas Birthday!

2011-11-30T08:06:00.000-08:00

This was taken in Taiwan in 2008, where I went there twice that year.

Tomorrow, I'm going back there to revisit all the food and shopping with my Jumpshot teammates. In addition, we'll be playing a friendly game there which is major awesomeness.

But then, my luggage is facing an impending explosion. I can't close it! No idea what I've been packing, seriously.

As with Australia last year, I'll be spending my birthday overseas for the 2nd time in a row. I wonder where I'll go next year... further, I hope.

Today, the office celebrated my birthday in advance, to my pleasant surprise, and I got 2 presents too!

And how time flies, I'm going to be 24 in 2 days!

See you guys when I'm 24 on Monday morning!

The Jamesthers on 26th Nov 2011

2011-11-27T07:54:00.000-08:00

James and Esther are officially married!

It was a happy occasion for the couple, who started dating the same time I joined the church. From the first time when Sean accidentally let slip that they were seeing each other, to the time where they announce their engagement, then to the meticulous planning of the wedding (3 excel sheets to go through ok!), and finally, by God's grace, they are now linked in holy matrimony.

I wrote this on their wedding guestbook after being inspired by the solemniser after she talked about wedding rings being a complete circle, symbolising there is no end to their love.

"Dear Jamesther,
Since a ring is an endless circle, what does 2 rings represent?

Infinite love! (Draws an infinity sign)

Then what does 5 rings represent?

...

...

Olympics!

Loads of Love,
Deanna"

You Are The Apple Of My Eye

2011-11-24T08:53:00.000-08:00

当我发现到柯騰和沈佳宜到最后没有在一起时，和戏院里许多的人一样，流泪了。

被这个不是爱情故事的爱情故事感动了。

到最后，连手都没牵的他们终究还是朋友。

大家的背后都有不同的故事。

每一个故事，好与坏，都留下哝哝的回忆和想念。

可能，到最后，希望我的故事也会得到，或留下，一份友情吧。

Wedding March

2011-11-22T08:11:00.001-08:00

I just came back from a wedding rehearsal in the chapel.

My first wedding rehearsal, but obviously I'm not the bride. The honour of that goes to Mrs Esther Ang-to-be, my cellgroup mate whose dating progress with Mr James Ang was witnessed by all of us over the past 2 years.

From enduring endless teasing, to admitting their relationship, to making this big step in cementing their commitment to each other, by God's grace, this is it.

As I watched Esther walk down the aisle as she tries to perfect the timing to the wedding music playing from the speakers, there was a warm and fuzzy vibe all around. I also caught Michelle staring dreamily at the bride-to-be, probably wondering in her mind what will she do when it's her turn.

In just over an hour, the rehearsal was over and done with. And all that's left to do is to wait for Saturday, when the real thing happens. I'm really excited about this- which is quite surprising considering I was relaxed much when it came to my own sister's wedding. Weddings also have that magnetic effect to make us all believe that love between a couple can be chaste, pure, beautiful.

I'm sure Saturday will be magnificent.

Against The Titans

2011-11-17T08:58:00.000-08:00

I found myself breathless about 3 minutes into the game against one of the three biggest clubs in Singapore.

I was huffing, puffing, and I could feel the stomach stitching up.

不认老也不行啊。

But just playing against them, looking at the way they pass with such precision, the way they play in a whole new level with such fluidity and ease, wow, you really take your hats off them. Of course, these people sacrifice so many other things just for the game, and it's obvious how hard work pays off on court.

Well, for me, I was never the one who'd go all out to train like crazy when I was young. I was the one who took the CCA as it was, a CCA. Just being able to don the jersey and get some playing time, that's good enough for me.

And now, it has come to a point where many times, I've been asking myself, am I still going to continue to play? I'm just one player, in the midst of so many talented girls. And, to be realistic, I'm not that good anyway. Sometimes, I wonder what keeps me going.

In fact, it's not passion that keeps me going.

It's that feeling, that feeling when you run and you just want to stop, but you know you can't, that feeling of your muscles about to burst, but you still have to grit your teeth and continue on.

That "muscle burning, panting like a hounddog when you find yourself at the end point, surprised you're still alive" kind of feeling.

That "hey, I'm not that weak" feeling.

Feels good.

Anything to take the mind off work.

Sad to say, while huffing and puffing during the game, I was slow jogging back every time the opponents got the ball and went on their fast break. I want to say I'm too old already, but oh well, I think my stamina is down the drain. Nevermind, on the positive side, I had 3 assists and scored 2 points (ya, easily satisfied haha), even though I was so confused because Coach put me as a forward.

Now, my aim is to eat a lot and gain weight so that I can hold my own against the taller, meaner, bigger people on court. I want to be FAT!

But still pretty. I want to be pretty fat. Hahaha. That doesn't sound right.

Fat people are usually happy people. So I want to be fat. :) Plus, Christmas is coming around, so putting on some weight shouldn't be hard.

You know where to find me during those Christmas parties/ weddings. Buffet lines, here I come!

I want to be a big fat Dinah Saw!

The Post Producer.

2011-11-14T06:46:00.000-08:00

That's me.

That's what I do at work everyday, producing post. No, not the kind with the envelops and stamps, but edits after edits after edits.

At the start, I wasn't really producing post, but I was doing more coordination to make sure the in-house editor, aka "Left Neh Neh" (he called himself that) had his footage on time and that he hands up his edits on time as well.

After a while, I was given more responsibility, like checking tapes after they were dumped out, then sending them off to the only terrestrial broadcast station in Singapore.

Then slowly, I got my break, and now, added on to these responsibilities is the honourable task of cutting an entire episode by myself. Then another, then another.

My best friend at work is the humble Final Cut Pro, where I probably can say I know about 10% of its true prowess.

Well, that just goes to show that I have a long way to go. But hey, I'm not complaining.

I had a chat with my Secondary School form teacher on Facebook last week at 11pm. I remembered the time because I told him I was still in the office. With his 3 kids smiling widely on his profile picture, it reminded me that time stops for no one. He said, "I bet you're in some media company. I always remember that you were hooked after attending some workshop after your O Levels."

How did you know, Mr Thomas? Indeed I'm hooked.

Just having that conversation with him allowed me to think back on my teenage dreams and how far I've come. Dreams are probably one of the hardest things to quash, remember that, and let's just keep on going cos when the going gets tough, the tough get...

GOING all the way!

All I Want For My Birthday Are.... (ankle) SOCKS!

2011-11-10T08:07:00.000-08:00

Don't laugh at my weird birthday wishlist.

You know I need 'em after having to resort to wearing 2 socks with different designs just to make up the numbers.

Or that the pairs that matches have holes here, there, or there. Don't ask me why there are holes. I might have worn the socks out with my intensive trainings.

So yes, socks. They're a good gift. Easy on the pockets, come in all sorts of shapes and sizes, small and sweet.

Especially ones with Homer Simpson's face on it. (But I have 2 pairs of that and they've got holes already- mega sigh)

But just so you know, I already got a big fat present. Or rather, the Tan family got the big fat present. Let's just put it that, we're all good now. The brother, the sister, the mother and the father. It's a load of hard angsty bricks that's been building for ten over years and it's finally fallen. Ironically, the trigger-point of this reconciliation was because of some scrappy A Level notes that fell into the toilet bowl.

But more of that, when I'm ready to share that overwhelming night. You're probably confused. It's okay. Not a lot of people about this family issue we've been having for the past decade, but we're just glad to come to a turning point.

The one thing that this taught me is to never take the easy way out. Sure, it'll be the fastest solution out there, but whether it leaves other long term problems in its wake is another thing altogether.

And so, enough of complications. All I want are socks. There's no issues with socks.

Oh, by the way, you can watch this- http://video.xin.msn.com/browse/okto

I'm Script Supervisor in there. :)

Glorious Sunday (Or How I Sucked My Sunday Dry)

2011-11-06T09:55:00.000-08:00

This sleeping baby is Keren, and she's only 21 days old! It's always amazing to look at little children and see their innocence and fervor for the new world that surrounds them. Seems like we all should learn from them and throw away all our old inhibitions and be like newborns, exactly like this little shark (her mother calls her that, haha.)

Anyway, visiting her was one of the many things I did today. Love my Sundays, especially those that comes accompanied by a public holiday -wait for it- Monday. How precious are these days!

So here's what I did. I'm writing this down because it's a rare thing for me to pack so many things into one day.

1. Church at 8.30am, with Leanne!

2. A pre-wedding briefing for Jamesther's wedding. Really hope that I'll be able to attend the rehearsal, what with the unpredictability of dates these days with a tournament coming up.

3. Called Joyce to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY! The girl was probably pressing the phone hard to her ears in some street in Melbourne, and half the time she was unable to hear much, but it was still good considering everyone in the cell group got to talk to her for a well.

4. Went to see baby Keren! Soon, she'll probably look like the Michelin Man, and start to crawl, walk, talk, and be 18 in a flash. But it's okay, 21-day old sleeping Keren has been immortalised in this photo.

5. Afternoon coffee/taboo session with Jasmine, Gwen and Michelle in a nice cosy coffeehouse in the middle of nowhere. Okay, it was Upper Thomson, but it did felt like nowhere. Was thinking that if I knew of that place earlier, would have brought people over there. Missed Yuen because she had to leave before I came over, but it was a very nice time hanging out with them.

6. Jeremy's house for a farewell for cellgroup mate Jon before he turns into Army Boy/Man. I was the oldest there, can you believe it? Loads of food to fill the tummy, a Taboo gender war and a very fierce dog ironically named "Mei Mei" who is anything but, capped the evening.

7. And finally, at 11pm, watched the neither-here-nor-there flick "In Time" with cell mates. Samuel quipped, "Should be called Waste Time" and I couldn't agree more. But exchanging our exasperation with the unexciting Timberlake vehicle was quite funny.

And that's the end of my day, well, nearly, since it's 2.35am as I'm typing it while listening to Plain White Tee's "1,2,3,4" (a significant song for a special event coming soon. As if it hasn't been significant enough.)

So I've been kept busy. In a relaxing way. Which is probably good considering Christmas is coming again, also not forgetting the birthday. 24. Yikes.

And now, I finally feel the fatigue settling into the bones. Goodnight, sweet dreams, and a very happy public holiday Monday.

Friday Night Lights

2011-11-04T07:06:00.000-07:00

What do I do to entertain myself if I'm all alone in the office on Friday night?

I also don't know.

My face quite oily eh?

Someone Like You- Adele

2011-10-28T11:36:00.000-07:00

Running takes my mind off certain things.

But at the same time, it forces me to focus on some.

I had a quick chat with God while running just now from my house to Bishan Park and then back. I had a stomachache while at Bishan Park so I stopped and walked for a while. It was peaceful, tranquil, a little dark but it wasn't too scary. It was all very nice and serene, but my heart wasn't. I was in a sort of a mess, the kind of mess that I should have pulled myself up a long time ago but didn't, the kind of mess like a drunken tattoo somewhere hidden gone wrong. Yes, that kind.

The kind that nobody can help you. Only God. My fear though, is that He's been sending people to help me, but I'm too preoccupied to notice.

Anyway, it doesn't matter. I still had a good chat with The Man Upstairs. In time, I'll understand why certain things work in certain ways, why people can be so nice at once and nasty the next.

We're no longer kids who tear each other up over who gets the most love from our parents. We're all grown up now.

This post wasn't meant to be ended in this way, but it just goes to show that there are bigger messes to fix than (figurative) drunken tattoos and whatnot. We just gotta move on from what's in front of us to something more. So,

"Nevermind I'll find someone like you.
I wish nothing but the best for you.
Don't forget me, I pray,
I remember you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love and sometimes it hurts
instead."

Sometimes it lasts, sometimes it hurts, and we just gotta get a grip on and move on.

Stop Taking My Permanent Marker!

2011-10-25T23:44:00.000-07:00

I think the most important stationary tool for a production person is the humble permanent marker.

So I need it. Give it back.

On a different note, I'm still loving Avril Lavigne.

Happy Deepavali people!

The 10th Month of the Year.

2011-10-23T09:51:00.000-07:00

I might be imagining things, but I highly doubt it.

Premiere

2011-10-20T08:08:00.000-07:00

This is my show's opening titles when it was Season 1. Now, it's in Season 2, and it's on air. First episode is on today!

Finally, after months of hard work, it's out here for the world. First and foremost I need to thank my friends who helped me as extras/scour for extras. Thanks Yan!

Yesterday was the wrap party, and I only had 2 beers, but that was it. Never have been a good drinker, and I wonder when I ever will be. But it was good to mingle with the cast and crew, and just let loose for once. It was really too stressful for the past few days before the wrap party, but I'm just glad it's all over.

Even told Patricia that I saw her on a rerun of 搞笑行动 the night before, and she said "Ya, can you imagine? That was the time where I just joined them, and it's already 14 years! I bet you were a kid when you first watched it."

It was good. Even got some valuable advice from the freelance editor.

Now, it's Knockout time. 29 episodes down, and 23 more to go!

Click below to see the articles related to my show:

http://www.tnp.sg/content/pat-mok-flaunting-her-big-mouth

http://sg.entertainment.yahoo.com/blogs/singapore-showbiz/vernetta-lopez-saving-world-one-time-065135227.html

7am.

2011-10-18T09:58:00.000-07:00

You know you've been working too late when you work so late into the night that when you turn around, you see day.

But I'm still sustaining.

And there's a weekend to look forward to. Weekends, now, since I need not be on set anymore.

Of course, as I speak, I'm still here, in the office. Leaving soon, though, thank God.

This is the phase where work takes centre stage. And I must say, it is easy to lose yourself in all of these.

At least after work there's still other things to look forward to. Like spontaneous cell supper even though I had to crawl up at 8 the next day. Like having so much fun with lunch on Sunday. Like seeing the people you've grown to love over the past 2 years. And of course, hearing the good news of Justin & Kim's baby being born.

It's all good. And now... done. Time to go home!

God=Good

2011-10-12T08:39:00.000-07:00

It was morning. I was putting the hard disk with all my life's work- ok, I exaggerate, it's only 1 project- into my pretty little backpack when my hand slipped.

Piang.

Shit happened. The hard disk that has my final cut pro file went toot, toot, toot, toot, and stopped turning.

Okay, don't panic. Go to work. Maybe it'll be okay when I get to work.

So I went to work, set up my laptop, plugged in my hard disk. And waited. And waited. Switched the hard disk off, then on, and waited. And waited.

Then almost pulled my hair out. Nothing. The computer couldn't even detect the hard disk, which makes my $150 Data Rescue software useless.

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo was the word I was looking for. Could have gone on even longer. I wish. But I'm not one to mope and cry while time was running out. I had to present this edit by this evening! All I needed was my fcp file. I had back ups of everything else. Just that darn fcp file stuck in the doomed hard disk.

So I made a few calls, checked out some Sim Lim Square websites, and whisked over. While in the cab, I asked Felily and Joyce to pray. There was nothing, nothing else to do, but pray. Oh, how I wish I could pry open that stupid $477 LACIE hard disk and magically set all its parts back so that it won't go "toot toot toot too", but no, I can't.

Nothing else to do, but pray. Really, really hard.

I went up to the 5th floor, where there were some repair shops, got this chap who say they'll look at it and call me within an hour or two to see if they can fix it, then I went to get lunch. I switched on my laptop after lunch, intending to continue on some graphics for the same project when...

Usually, there's an "autosave vault" function in Final Cut. I always direct the "autosaved" files, which are files progressively saved as you do your project, into the hard disk I work on. It's a habit, and I always tell my interns to do the same, because it will take up space if you put it on your laptop.

But this time, THIS time, I forgot that I directed all my files to my laptop, when I had to do some minor editing the day before. And then I forgot to switch it back to the hard disk.

So it means that whatever I worked on yesterday, was "autosaved" in a folder in MY DESKTOP.

When I opened the folder in anticipation, and saw the file I needed so badly sitting there, comfortably, in my own desktop, I was just overwhelmed. I double-clicked it, and it opened. Like magic. It was there, everything was there.

Now all I needed to do was to reconnect everything, which wasn't hard because I had everything else backed up.

And there, relief sets in. Relief that God always have my back. Praise the Lord and His awesomeness.

Also thank you Felily and Joyce!!!

Up In The Air

2011-10-07T11:06:00.000-07:00

My previous post below is just a small-time self-pity rant, which you can ignore.

In fact, I was moping about the fact that I worked late the whole week, but no no, don't have to take pity on me. I should be glad for that actually, because I was given an opportunity to do something big. Something that'll be on tv. Put smiley face. :)

Ya, happy la, even though I missed night time activities.

It's amazing to see how the opportunities come when you are patient and press on. And definitely, these are God-given, I have to acknowledge that.

You see the picture above? I was supposed to talk about my Bali trip, but no time lah. But I would like to share that special moment immortalised by this picture.

Para-sailing.

Basically, you wear your harness, you listen to the guy with 2 flags. And before you know it, your harness is clipped to the parachute and the people are asking you to run. Run! Run!

It's only 5 seconds before the wind takes you up. There's no way of coming back down, you're going higher now. You're scared, but all you can do is hold on to the parachute. You can see the boat now, then you see corals, and then you see the whole beach below you.

You're still scared. In awe, yes, but still afraid, tense. Afraid that you might somehow fall. It's beautiful though, and if you weren't so scared, you'll be enjoying the view.

Right there, right at the top of the world, with wind at your feet and the sky within your reach, you start talking to the only person who can calm you down. God.

After about 5-7 minutes, you find your feet on sand again. Ahh, you survived.

I've never been much of a thrill seeker, but I believe that this experience probably made me bolder, and grateful.

Wow, I have been empowered.

The Week.

2011-10-07T11:01:00.000-07:00

Monday I mope.

Tuesday I mope even more.

Wednesday I mope the hardest.

Thursday I get sick of moping.

Friday I get sick of myself moping.

Saturday and Sunday so happy!

Monday I mope again.

Stressed is Just Desserts Spelt Backwards

2011-10-01T08:29:00.000-07:00

Stress is but a passing phase.

That's what I tell myself.

Also, one step forward, but three steps back.

That is something I don't quite understand about myself. Always, you know. I see familiar things from 2010 in 2011, yet they are starkly different. And so I just have to remind myself, hello, not same anymore la. Stop living in the past, can?

Funny how when things are gone, you realise how much you've taken them for granted. And how beautiful they were.

I probably matured, by my own standards, in leaps and bounds in 2011. And I think my writing's very irregular. Like my heart has a stone and the words just don't come out right. Whereas I try to be happier/lame in my posts last time, I think my posts for this year don't really make sense.

And I over-analyze.

It's true. My heart has a stone. And this stone is trying to teach me a lesson, I reckon. About perseverance, about passion, about how I live, and most importantly, about love.

This is a fact- love never fades. It may dwindle, it may grow small, but it'll never fade. And it took me, what, the whole of my life to finally see how unselfish one can be when it boils down to the people you love.

I love love. Geddit? I lurve love.

Aiyo, so emo. Must be the lack of sleep.

Amongotherthings.

There's something about the 80s.

2011-09-24T07:26:00.000-07:00

In spite of all its kitschy fashion sense and bad hairdos, something good came out of the 80s. The term "Rock n Roll". And the songs.

Can't get the opening riff out of my head. And the AWESOMENESS of the song.

Air Supply- Making Love Out Of Nothing At All

Air Supply- All Out Of Love

Bonnie Tyle- Total Eclipse of the Heart

The Cascades- Rhythm of the Rain (ok I think this one super old)

Guns N' Roses- Sweet Child 'O Mine

Bon Jovi- I'll Be There For You

On The Excitable-To-Death Thrill Of Diving*

2011-09-19T08:49:00.000-07:00

So, there I was, floating in the middle of the sea. With an oxygen tank on my back and a dozen gadgets around me, in a wetsuit and flippers which I had struggled to put on with dear life, there I was.

It was only when the instructor, there were 3 of them thank God, asked us to press the button so that we would sink into the waters, that I realised that was it. "Oh shit."

I've never dived before. As cool as it looked, I never thought I would be doing it. I didn't quite think it through before booking the "Discover Scuba Diving" course with Leanne. C'mon, it'll be fun, I said. Okay, she said. Plus, Priscilla, my Anti-You teammate was having an internship there. Wouldn't it be cool if she was the one teaching us?

And as it turned out, she was the one teaching us. And 6 other Caucasians who picked up the theory part really quick. But I digress. Where was I?

Ah, yes. In the middle of the sea. I pressed the button, and soon I sank. It didn't feel cool the first time I felt my head go underwater. It was horrifying. Like, oh shit, what did I just do? A million thoughts about dying went through my head. I'm going to drown, I'm going to die, I'm going down and never coming up. That is, till I discovered the power of the regulator, also known as the thing you'll wanna suck on and never let go ever.

Well, of course, during the theory part, Priscilla did a great job explaining the mechanisms of diving and the functions of the equipment, including the regulator which you use to suck oxygen. But when your head is underwater, and all you want to do is breathe through your nose, which you can't, obviously, and you see a million new things that you've never seen, what happens is panic.

It's a different kind of six feet under.

After a while, I calmed down. I guess survival instincts kicked. If I don't calm down, I'll just die in that sea, which would be silly considering the surface was only about 10cm away from the top of my head. Plus, I saw that the rest of the beginners had no trouble getting to about 4 metres deep, and the other instructor, Mike, was already beginning his lessons with them underwater.

Singaporeans die die also cannot lose face. And in this case, it was literal.

So I decided to buck up, and swim to where they were, forcing myself not to breathe through the nose but through the regulator. But then, another problem presented itself. The deeper I went, the more the eardrums and the brain felt like bursting. It was like being in an airplane, only 100000 times worse and more painful.

Ok. Maybe I'd rather lose face than die.

In the end, I went back upwards to the surface- by then I knew how to go up to the surface, that's probably the only thing I learnt. Leanne was there, at the surface too, with the same problems. We couldn't equalize, Priscilla said, but it's okay, because it's an issue a lot of new divers face. So for the first part of the day, we floated along the surface looking down into the sea. Snorkeling, in a diving suit.

During lunch, Priscilla explained the ways to equalize. Just close all your airways and force air out, like how you try to stop a sneeze.

After lunch, we went back down and tried again. This time, Mike took me while Pris took Leanne. I got the hang of it after a bit, and the equalizing thing worked. After a few seconds, the head didn't feel like bursting anymore- YAY! No more deathly images of my own brain matter floating in the sea. Breathing through the mouth became easier as soon as I told myself, if you start breathing through your nose, you'll die.

While Leanne had not much luck equalizing- it's really scary as hell feeling your brain stretch, I had the opportunity to swim around with Mike. Wasn't swimming much, anyway. Rather, it was him pulling me along. Anyway, we were at a famous shipwreck site, so I got to see parts of the ship and the aquatic life that now lived in it. It's amazing how much beauty there is in the water, but of course, you have to calm down first to appreciate them. Mike pointed out a whirling school of jack fishes. There must be hundreds of them, swimming in one ball. Spectacular. He also led me through the wreck, and I mean THROUGH the wreck. Of course, I had to stop everytime we went deeper to equalize, but I probably went about 10metres. Which was good enough for me, a first timer.

You can die diving.

But to see life underwater is like being in the world of Avatar, totally unreal and different. I can't say that all the risks involved are worth the experience, but what I can say is, the human body is highly adaptable. Maybe one day, I'd have the time and courage to get the license.

But that's another day. And that will be another story altogether.

* I had the urge to write this down lest I forget how scary being impulsive actually is.

The Anecdotal Hong Kong Hangover Part 2: Freeloader Alert

2011-09-18T22:32:00.000-07:00

This post is a guide on how to survive on zero amount of money in Hong Kong. Simple, grab a parent and go.

Yeap, I became a freeloader for 4 days.

I'm such a happy freeloader!

This was because I needed to save up for my Bali trip, and with my finances, the reality was that I could only afford 1 trip, which I had intended was the Bali trip. But bless my Mama, she said that she wanted to reward me for working so hard, so she decided to sponsor this Hong Kong holiday.

Now, the tricky part is, how do you pay for things without actually paying? Here's 3 easy steps.

1. Smile wide and point. "Hehe, Mummy... nice hor?"
2. Get Mummy to buy something from the same place. "Eh! Look nice on you!"
3. Seal the deal by putting your freeloaded goods with Mummy's stuff when she pays for hers.

New basketball shoes!

Wah, I can hear you "tsk tsk-ing" already. That's what my big sister did for the whole trip. "Eh, you not pai seh one hor?"

My reply? "I got no money to be pai seh leh."

Ya lor, very happy.

That said, I know and I really thank the Man Above for my family who has thoroughly blessed me and feed me. If you see my double chin, you know they feed me really well.

But you know, we, as humans, always have something to grumble about. I know I do, which of course, if you put the magnitude of His blessings for you against whatever you're grumbling about, it becomes miniscule. Like a Pi Sai in your nose. We just gotta dig it out, shoot it off, and move on.

Haha. Such a disgusting analogy.

Actually, I did work for the things I bought. By doing what I do best- navigating. And even though, as usual, my mum and sister are always doubtful of where I bring them, we always get to the place in the end.

Next up- How to navigate the streets of Hong Kong.

A Good Break

2011-09-18T09:16:00.000-07:00

And I'm home after another vacation in nearby Bali.

It was a good break and I'll be writing all about it, along with The Anecdotal Hong Kong Hangover.

Gosh, I'm so lucky.

Maybe my life isn't as exciting as plain bread anymore.

With God in control, life's never dull.

I Go Back To December All The Time

2011-09-14T08:02:00.000-07:00

Because I was unemployed and a bum.

Because it's my birthday month.

Because I'm still penniless after 9 months. Where did all my money go?

Because I still had a red car.

Nevermind, just 4 months to go till it's December again!

The Anecdotal Hong Kong Hangover Part 1: The Masseuse Murderer

2011-09-13T10:04:00.000-07:00

Hello everybody. I'm just back from a nice 4 day 3 night trip from Hong Kong. And because you know how much I like to talk about my travels, I hereby present The Anecdotal Hong Kong Hangover. This can be used as a travel guide for future travelers to Hong Kong, but it's really lousy, so please use Lonelyplanet or something better if you wish to gain good, solid information. Anyway, this is a really short series because yours truly has to go back to work soon, so, enjoy.

This first story is on the Masseuse. Even modified a song about her which you can see on my FB status. It all started when my mum, my sis and I were so tired after a day at Ocean Park, then a night at Mong Kok that we decided to go for a foot massage. We went to a place where my sister had gone before, and we took the package that had 60 minutes foot massage + 25 minutes body massage. The foot massage went great. And then, it was the body massage. That's when it all began.

My masseuse was petite, and keeping in mind not to be rude, had a huge front which she flaunted proudly with a low cut tee. I had to avoid looking at the twin peaks every time she bent over to clap the leg muscles during the foot massage. But never mind those, they weren't the deadliest things on her. For sure.

So, I was ushered into a small room and had to lie down on a bed with a hole in the middle for my face. After 25 minutes, while I was changing back into my clothes, I told my sister who was in the same room that it wasn't a massage.

It was murder.

"Huh? What?" My sister asked.

No doubt about it. Don't let her small size fool you, this masseuse has killer elbows. And when she felt that the strength wasn't enough, she would climb on top of me and "HAIYA!", jab 'em down my shoulders.

Okay la, she never shouted "Haiya".

It's actually kinda my fault. I only told her it really hurt after she was done with one side. And she said "Huh? Why didn't you tell me earlier? I thought you enjoyed it."

No. I may look like I was enjoying it, but I was dying inside. Of immense pain. And I wondered how she derived that I was enjoying it because my face was stuck in that hole, wincing at the only things I can see- her shoes and the floor.

"I think she was trying to seek revenge because we didn't want the pedicure." I told my sister, as an afterthought.

"Eh, but I also didn't want to do the pedicure, and my masseuse was okay." My sister said.

Well, perhaps I've not been pre-warned about the HK-style hard massage. More used to the smooth oil Thai massage that doesn't involve jabbing. The HK masseuse, in her defense, said that pain is good, that it'll feel really good after.

Of course it'll feel good. Anything will feel good if you're not jabbing at it like meat on a chopping board.

She left a long-lasting and deep impression on me.

Because the very next day, I could still feel the part of my back where she jabbed.

I'll never forget you, Masseuse with the twin peaks and killer elbows. You've got the moves like Jabber.

For One More Day

2011-09-08T08:27:00.000-07:00

And I'm gonna head home now.

Probably tomorrow I won't be able to sleep- not because I'm excited- but I'll be staring into Final Cut the whole night.

But I'm excited. About the thing I'm going to be making.

Hopefully it'll be good.

:)

Goodnight for now.

I Guess We're Done For Now.

2011-09-04T09:48:00.000-07:00

Xinying, Small Forward

I squeezed my only non-working day free dry, like a lemon, today.

First it was the 3-on-3 tournament at *scape which lasted from 8.15am till 6pm. I had a lot of fun, and also saw/ played with many familiar faces. It's nice.

Xiaomei! Long time no see! It also happened to be her birthday today!

We managed a third placing, as we lost out in the semi-finals by 1 point. Well, I've never gone so far in a 3-on-3 tournament before, so it was still good.

I was telling Sam that we must strive for 3rd placing at least, because the 4th placing has no prizes. Halfway, I began to sing:

"It's all about the money, money, money...
We all need the money, money, money...
It's not about the (other) prizes,
It's all about the ca-ash...

All about the cha-ching, cha-ching
Not about the ba-bling ba-bling
Wanna get my money
So we must win 3rd prize"
(Sing to the tune of Jessie J's Price Tag")

And I gotta say, I banged into Haixin AGAIN.

It was the same situation as the Women's Open last year. I wanted to screen for her, but she decided to cut in between me and the person I wanted to screen. So, bang! She hit her head on my lips, but other than a bump, she was okay. It's funny, but at the same time, quite embarrassing.

I also got my first technical foul because I forgot after we score, we cannot touch the ball. (But the referee didn't give any warning. Horrible man.) And he almost gave me another one shortly after because I forgot again. The rules we were playing with today was so different from the normal 3-0n-3 rules.

Don't know why so many unlucky things happen to me today. I was seated near the courtside when an intense match were going on between 2 Men's team. As I was standing up, a player flew towards me in a bid to try and save an out-of-bounds ball. And it was just nice that when he swung his hand, my head popped up.

It hurt. But even worse, it was really embarrassing.

Nevermind, brushing it off.

In the evening, the Jumpshot team played the 3rd-4th placing game, so we hurried from *scape to BAS. Sadly, when we arrived, it was almost half time and the team was being whipped. Basket after basket went into our net from fast breaks. We tried to catch up, and did a really great job in the 4th quarter, but alas, it was too little too late.

But nevermind again. Brushing it off.

As the teammates say in their last words interview with my Zoom 4n, "We'll be back... stronger."

Basically, now I'm really tired. So it's lights off for me now, and then a grueling 5 days of non-stop work. But it's okay....

HONGKONG ON SATURDAY!!! VACATION, HERE I COME!!!

All We Need Is Encouragement

2011-09-02T10:36:00.000-07:00

Cheryl, Centre

I was thinking while driving my dad's car on the way home, after sending 5 church friends home (just like old times), what if I take a one year break from work? Then I can travel the world. Well, on a shoestring budget of course. That's not hard, considering bread and jam spread are part of my staple when I travel, and a really great way to save on meals.

So, I said to myself, when I turn 27- literally the moment I turn 27, I should pack up and leave, then return on my 28th birthday.

Now how cool will that be?

Of course, conditions will be that I'm single/not pregnant/ have saved enough. I picked the age of 27 out of thin air, but I guess that would be the time where the 3rd condition would be most realistic.

Whaddaya think? It's going to be exciting/scary/tedious/a bitch/adventurous/ an eye-opener/ crazy/ dangerous all at the same time.

Oh wait, I've done those things. It's called "my job".

All the better. With so much training now, I'll probably survive to return for my 28th.

The Days Go Trudging On

2011-09-01T08:32:00.000-07:00

Huiling, Power Forward/Point Guard

I need some inspiration.

A major edit (by me) hangs in the balance as the most boring product yet (in my opinion), and I need to squeeze out some creativity.

On a separate note, I need to stop dreaming. They are really disturbing/distracting and sucks up a lot of my sleeping energy. Especially when I dream about work, and then wake up to... no prizes for guessing...WORK!

That sucks. If only I can clock in those hours in my dreams for the real working hours. Then maybe I wouldn't mind.

Dreaming too many times is not healthy... right?

I need Hong Kong and Bali, which is 9 days away. YES!

And the countdown begins.

Red Blooded Passion

2011-08-28T22:03:00.000-07:00

3-1 was the scoreline when I switched on the TV.

And when it was over, it was truly over. The floodgates opened and spectacular goals went in one after another. 8-2! We tore the Arsenal defense to shreds!

Two similar, but deadly accurate goals from Young, and we know that Fergie's next generation of fledglings is ready to snatch the championships again.

Glory to Manchester United, the club where Dreams are made of.

TaTan Tan Tan (Hum to the tune of Beethovan's 5th Symphony))

2011-08-26T09:05:00.000-07:00

Jac, Point guard.

I walked past Wheelock Place today, and the Orange Julius outside was replaced by Garrett's. Borders is moving out. Starbucks has undergone a revamp and now looks like a chic coffeehouse.

And in the blink of an eye, it's time to take down the portrait of His Excellency S R Nathan and his wife after staring at them in schools for 12 years. It's time to usher in a new President.

Also, it's finally time for a break. 4 days in a row, after 19 days of work.

Wow. It's the dawn of a new era.

The Greatest Story Never Told

2011-08-21T09:37:00.000-07:00

Won 2 and lost 1.

Lots of ways to write the script. So.... start now.

No wait-

2011-08-18T19:04:00.000-07:00

Dreams, they jest.

I found myself in my old school after I fell asleep. Classmates from the secondary school appeared and we've to form a line. Hey, isn't this.. I trailed, and we were all happy to see one another again.

Ha. Secondary school. Those 'lion king' days were probably the most awkward and insecure days of my life- to date. Hello, mushroom head. But since a thicker skin have grown over this face over the last ten years, I doubt I'll ever feel so small again.

A stranger with a beautiful smile came into the dreamland. 'Why are you here?' I asked, but didn't get any answer. She sat down with me and listened to my stories on the secondary school life.

And that was my dream, before I woke up to piercing rays of sunlight and a (lovely) mother who shouted,'Late already! Late already!'

I've never been a good interpreter of dreams, or even attempted to interpret dreams. But standing in that past with my present being, it felt different.

In any case, I really don't know what the dreamt meant, but it was nice to dream of all of you again.
Sent via BlackBerry from SingTel!

The Jumpshot Project

2011-08-16T08:25:00.000-07:00

I have a/an
- entry level Canon 550 camera
- Zoom H4n sound recorder
- Lenovo PC monitor "stolen" from my Dad hooked up to my Mac
- Final Cut
- a cheapo tripod

And all I need to do is to come up with a brilliant script on the basketball team.

Guerrilla film-making, here I come.

Walking.

2011-08-15T08:05:00.000-07:00

I'm on the train, as we speak.

The sound of the train whisking by is making me sleepy. My eyes are getting droopy, even more so by the minute, and I can't wait to get home.

But I feel like buying green apples first. Thank God for the 24/7 Shop n Save.

Last week I had no weekends. This coming week it'll be the same. Gwen, who randomly dreamt of me, was talking to me on whatsapp, and she asked," So are you happy at your job?"

"I dunno. Just do lor." I said.

Right now, I've no idea where these will take me. And I know I'm the kind you can call 'stupid', who is willing to help at no benefits. Yup, I'm the kind who'll drive you all the way home from one corner of Singapore to the other without question.

Sometimes, I do wonder if I'm worth more than what I'm doing now.

But as Felily said, I'm immovable. So I'll just, as your tee shirt/badge/handbag says, keep calm and carry on.

I'm now walking to buy green apples. Just cos it'll make me a wee bit happier. Smiley face. :)

And then I walked out of the supermarket with cheap ice cream, ice lemon green tea and my green apples. Gonna get myself fat, and I don't really care.

Walked past the Ben and Jerry's section, which I stared at for a while, then told myself,"Let's go." I can't afford luxury these days as I count down to Hong Kong/Bali, and I don't want to be reminded that my past only exist as a memory.

Now I'm walking home. Something new, to be typing and walking, not to mention carrying a 5kg crumpler and a bag of apples, ice cream and drinks. It's nice. To be away from the ipod for a while and hear the city which is still very much awake.

Alright, I'm almost home. What do I realise out of this walk home? Life's not a sprint, and mine's certainly not a marathon.

It's a bloody odyssey.

He Hears And Answers

2011-08-10T08:05:00.000-07:00

God sends dreams to seraphs and whatsapp to cherubs.

And they've been nothing but angels to me.

Once again, it proves that He's been listening.

For the past few weeks, I haven't been feeling the best. Moody, mopey, with the thoughts of "life sucks" swirling around. I know the main reason for me feeling that way. It's a fear, really. Fear of being alone.

(Having colleagues that quit no sooner than you learn their surname does bad things to one's mental health. Also, having no weekends to go out and meet friends is a downer.)

Yesterday night, I got a teammate to drop me off at a bus stop after training, and only after waiting for 15 minutes did I realise the usual bus has changed its route. It no longer stops at the bus stop I was at. So, I picked up my bag and walked. Could've gotten a cab, but nah, thought it would be nice to walk.

And so I did.

Along the way, I talked to The Man Upstairs. God, please, show me your vision for me. Let me hear your voice and guide me to where I should be. God, why am I behaving like an angsty teenager, with so much sadness inside of me? God, what have become of me? Why do I constantly get stuck in the past, unable to move on? And God, I know it was my own foolishness that brought all this. I know it shouldn't be on You to remove this burden, but you are so wonderful and selfless, that I know I can count on you.

As I walked, I could feel my heart swirling as I poured out my emotions.

I've never been so emotionally affected before- and it isn't because of food. It's a million and one little insignificant things which collide and burst into a huge fireball of unwanted anxiety, self-doubt and low confidence.

But I believe that He's always there. It felt like He was stretching his hand out, beckoning me. "Child, take my hand and I'll pull you out." It's just that, somehow, I've become a whiny spoilt brat. "No, Father. Let me indulge in my self-loathe. Let me feel sorry for myself for being this way."

I finished the walk home with a soft "Amen."

This morning, I woke with the same ideas in my head. I hugged my bolster tight, hoping it would transport me to yesteryear. Of course it didn't, and I went to work. Out of nowhere, Felily sent a whatsapp message.

"I dreamt of you. How are you!"

"Not so good..." and I began to lament about my black hole state. It was comforting. Joyce, too, far away in Australia, have been praying for me.

And it reaffirms the truth that He's always, always here for me. No matter what.

Maybe my blog heading "Refine me, Lord, through the flame" is really a hard process.

Pray for me, and I'll surely get through.

Amen.

We used to chase fireworks.

2011-08-08T08:36:00.000-07:00

Now we're just chasing greens.

Render Me Hopeless.

2011-08-03T06:44:00.000-07:00

If there was a way where video doesn't need rendering to be viewed, editors would have a life.

Yup.

I'm waiting for the darn video to be rendered. At 9plus in the night. And I must say, it knows how to take its time eh.

Oh. It's done! Great.

回家！

Livin' on a Mountain High

2011-07-30T08:31:00.000-07:00

(my brand new YA5 cell group!)

I bought a Zoom H4n and all my sister and I do is to sing into it like Karaoke.

But before you, the knowing videographer/soundman who knows the prowess of the Zoom H4n as a powerful low-budget sound recording device, interjects, it's because we're really too stressed from work.

Or rather, I am.

What's new, right? I'll be counting on adrenaline to push me through the month of August, where one weekend day is shoot day.

But I can do it, lah. Phillipians 4:13! Or is it 3:14?

-Now my sister is singing "Firework".-

3 giggly minutes later...

- And now my turn!-

Anyway, recently, I'm on a mission called "Ketchup". I'm trying to catch up (har har, hence the name) with people I haven't met in a while, and today, I met up with Yan Sze whom I haven't seen in 4-5 years at Renee's birthday, whom I haven't seen in 3-4 years before alumni . Then there was Cynthia, Yan, Kalai, Ah Qin from the Anti You team, Kenny who's been helping me all these years and I hope to add on, before my work drowns me and I fade into social oblivion (but famous on tv! HAHA.)

But usually, something has to trigger it first, like bumping into them, or being somewhere which reminds me of them, like Kenny who I always call in time of need. And for the longest time, the university So many people, so little time.

That said, Leanne, you're still on shopping priority la, k? Amanda, you're on blading priority and Charlene, yes, Captain America!

Joyce and Felicia, we're ketching-up in 中山公园.

- And my big sis has taken to showing me whatever's in her ear now and asking me to sympathise with her "wet and slimy" earwax predicament. "Eh you see" she says, and sticks the wax 5cm away from my face. "I think it's cos water went into my ear ..." She continues-

Aiya, now I forget where I was. Ah yes, ketching up!

But, my "minor" edit for one episode is done. Gotta check it.

Hmm, ketch up with you again!

Why I Like To Type Words On The Keyboard. A Monologue.

2011-07-27T09:02:00.001-07:00

Because literature is therapeutic.

I've just finished watching my tv show on Okto, saw my name roll up under the credits as "Assistant Producer" and felt a really small surge of satisfaction running though my veins.

Really small.

Have name appear on tv- Tick.

Anyway, have been stalking other people's blogs (hey who haven't!) and trolling on Facebook (like you're not doing it now), just trying to gather a glimpse of what it would be like to be someone else.

To have a different life.

To walk a different path.

To have another hobby that doesn't involve a particularly bouncy ball.

To have a whole other personality and a hair of bright red.

Ah well, the fantasies continue.

Will I be cooler in the end?

Well, does it matter?

Actually I have to admit I don't know how to continue with this post, but because I like to type words on the keyboard without having to look at it, plus I can afford to stay up for another half an hour, that's why I'm still typing.

And you've just wasted 30 seconds of your life reading this.

But that doesn't mean you should stop.

I guess it's in the way I write about stuff. Some people just have that flair to hook people in, and I just want to be funny.

In fact, half the things I write on this blog are not raw front line events that impact me. They're whittled, censored and packaged into a happy meal text.

You know why?

Cos I'm scared. I don't want my life to be an open book, but I enjoy the thrill of writing on the keyboard.

And I like my secrets. Shhhh. I like them safe, I like them sound, and I like them where I can trust them. In the hearts of people who matter.

You know, I really don't know how to end this.

Someday, I'll get some cathartic reaction to the things I write and it'll all make sense.

For now, I need to give myself a reminder that doesn't make much sense

Not to you who views my life as exciting as bread, cos I said so-

That is:

Remember your choice and love it.

静茹与情歌

2011-07-24T08:35:00.000-07:00

同样的一个地点。

同样是梁静茹。

同样的歌声。

但，四年前坐在室内体育馆的我和现在的我分别好多哦。

她的歌仍然好听。

只是，因为加了好多好多人身经验，她的歌带着哝哝的回忆。

对吧？两个上海的？

哎呀，就是很开心啦。在听的过程中，回忆不停地浮现在眼前。

都是美好的。

而且，可以看的出她真的真的用心地唱，把她最好的呈献给观众。

赞！

出场了！

我们小手拉大手
一起交游
今天别想太多

吻要闭上眼睛感觉
能让我飞也让我流泪
我都要你知道
－我都知道

爱你不是两三天
每天却想你很多遍
还不习惯孤独街道
拥挤人潮没你拥抱

我想说其实你很好
你自己却不知道
真心的对我好
不要求回报
爱一个人希望他过更好
打从心里暖暖的
你比自己更重要

我喜欢就这样
躺在你身旁
我喜欢赖在床上
看你喝汤

梁静茹，我爱你！！

如果我说
爱我没有如果
真的爱我就放手一博
还想什么还
怕什么
快牵起我的手

可惜不是你
陪我到最后
曾一起走却走失了那路口

分手快乐
祖你快乐
你可以找到更好的

勇气

爱真的需要勇气
来面对流言飞语
只要你一个眼神肯定
我的爱就有意义

你的姿态
你的青睐
我存在在你的存在
你以为爱
就是被爱
你挥霍了我的崇拜

Fly Away 当我不顾一切无止禁追寻
有一个人
有一颗心
早已经默默之中在那里

And the people who watched her concert were:

Hui Li's boyfriend. He's been a fan since 1999!

Charlene, who asked me to sit further from her because I kept screaming.

Hui Li, who messaged me if I was there. Turned out we were one block away in the stadium.

Charlene and Hui Li.

Hui Li and me.

梁静茹，快回来吧！

I THINK I HEAR HER!

2011-07-22T05:19:00.000-07:00

Yay! She's done. Weekend, here I come!

Bored Out Of My Wits

2011-07-22T05:10:00.000-07:00

It's 8pm. It's time for my cell group and then a weekend of no shoot.

BUT WAIT.

I'm stuck in the office waiting for the intern to finish her work.

AHHHHHHHH!!!!!

This is how bored I am...

Where's my WEEKEND?

Still waiting... faster!!!

Smile for what, am still waiting. Faster faster!!!

"I Am Your Father".

2011-07-21T08:44:00.000-07:00

One more DVD and the trilogy will be complete. Then I'll be able to differentiate between my Jar Jar Binks, Jabba the Hutt, Ewoks and of course, the always groaning Chewbacca. And legally wear my Star Wars tee without fear of reproach or disapproval or even worse, mockery from the Boss.

Gate of movie-redemption, here I come.

By the way, I had my yearly dose of Serangoon-ness last weekend. It was the annual SRJC basketball alumni, and once again, out of my batch, only 3 of us showed up. Well, could be worse.

By the end of the day, we had red cheeks, and the yearly rain that washed away the results of the Champion team came again. So we left for greener pastures at East Coast Park, sat and whiled away a nice Sunday afternoon. The topics that came up were juicy. Along the lines of the birds and the bees, but well, in this case, I would say it was more of the bees and the bees.

Gosh, I crack myself up.

And as it turns out, my life is as exciting as.... bread.

Like I said, it could be worse.

I do, however, find my job of having to shout out the lines to respectable TV stars somewhat exciting. Or reminding them to hold an object with the correct hand.

You think?

Perhaps I'm just like Luke Skywalker, waiting for the day where C3PO and R2D2 shows up. Then boom! Fast lane to Jedi-hood.

Yeap. That sounds promising. :)

(oh... and Hello! Ah Qin the Stalker!)

They don't make movies like they used to.

2011-07-18T09:36:00.000-07:00

"You talkin' to me?"

"I'll make him an offer he can't refuse."

"Forget it Jake. It's Chinatown."

Looks Just Like A Box!

2011-07-14T07:37:00.000-07:00

This is the Red One camera. In the hands of a competent director of photography, it can transform from a box to this:

Now, the question is, why didn't the old school buy one and let us play with it?

Believe In What Your Tee Shirt Says

2011-07-13T08:13:00.000-07:00

I've had a Star Wars tee shirt for 1 year now. It was bought in a H&M store in Tokyo when I helped my dad out at an event there.

Nobody said much about the shirt, only that it was quite cool, and "Wah, wearing Harrison Ford's face eh?"

In a sleepy stupor, I wore it to production a few weeks ago. The director of photography looked at my shirt and said, "Cool shirt!"

I said, "Ya."

"So you watch Star Wars?"

"No."

"What? You've never watched Star Wars? Don't talk to me."

Apparently, Star Wars is such a powerful franchise that a lot of people, especially people in production, are inspired by it.

Therefore, I decided to buy the trilogy (the old one with Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia) on eBay.

Let's hope it doesn't put me to sleep like what the new Transformers movie did.

Finding Emo.

2011-07-09T10:08:00.000-07:00

A lot on the mind recently, but haven't taken to drinking as of yet, even though the friends are planning to train me up on liquor limit.

If it's not Long Island Iced Tea I don't want ah.

But don't worry about me. Things on the mind are not problems faced now. Life's too good that I've been spending a lot of time reflecting.

Actually, less of reflecting and more of reminiscing.

The present tends to trigger the past. Much more of the past than the future.

But I did make the most out of my Saturday weekend, all 4 hours of it which was not SPENT AT WORK. I'm telling you, being a full timer is literal.

And also managed to catch up with the only (known) reader of this humble blog with a 9 course $68 super ATAS Japanese meal midweek.

Then bumped into Miss Cynthia Xu Sexy (read: She's Sexy) at the basketball court on Thursday in a chance meeting.

To end off the week, had a scary dream where I dreamt that I overslept and woke up too late to be on set at work. And then there was everyone from my past on set watching the show. Well, almost everyone, plus Stefanie Sun. And you were there again!

Strange, but also scary. Imagine my relief when I woke up.

Alright, I'm just gonna look right ahead. And maybe design a tee shirt when I'm free.

In the words of an infamous colleague, "Okay bye."

Best. Weekend. Ever.

2011-07-03T09:44:00.001-07:00

This girl came home!

And she was supposed to be in Australia studying her Masters and counting how many joeys fit into a kangaroo. Or something along those lines.

After having a really good Friday evening where I fell asleep during the climax of Transformers with Leanne, it was followed by a lazy Saturday evening with Amanda the Dinosaur and Charlene the self-professed gutless girl and a few drinks. To top it up, we ran into Leanne, a true coincidence, and hung out for a while under the moonlit sky with a huge tap that never seemed to run dry.

And on Sunday, as I was walking into service which was half a song into Praise and Worship, I spied with my eye a familiar presence and her pink cardigan. I did a few double takes and even thought I was still half asleep, but there she was, Miss Joyce Leong and her mannerisms, they were back!

It turned out she came back secretly on Thursday for her mum's baptism which was on Sunday, stocked up on supplies (said shampoo was expensive over there) and decided to surprise the heck out of everyone.

No la, she just wanted to spend more time with her family.

12 hours later that same Sunday, she was at the airport, ready to go back to the land where it's blistering cold right now and you're so bundled up there's no need to shave any part of the body. Or so I heard.

After many body crunching hugs and failed ploys to smuggle me and Felily on her luggage, she left for the Departure Gate, leaving us waving bon voyage frantically.

So, in conclusion, this has been the most magical weekend. And I love and appreciate God and his grace even more.

And now, at 1am Monday, I have to get back to reality and get my ass to bed so that I can wake up to a good week at work.

And to continue a good weekend, it's going to be an awesome week as well.

If I say so myself.

HDMI to Mini Display Port

2011-06-29T09:37:00.000-07:00

Such a random title. It's something I bought from the Apple Store to build on my ever expanding "home makeshift cheapo editing studio" dream in 2012 . Strangely, there's no more Final Cut products on the Apple Store. Must have been taken out by Mr Steve "I love my turtlenecks, all 1000 of them" Job after all that complaints about Final Cut X.

Looking at the hilarious Conan O' Brian's video slamming it, and the interface looking more like a souped up iMovie than a professional editing software, it'll probably come as no surprise if they pull that dud from the shelves.

On a different, more poignant/bittersweet/tragic-comedy-ish note, I dreamed of you last night.

What an open ended revelation!

I surprise myself sometimes.

And I'm rambling.

Or beyond rambling.

I love you God, and I pray for my desires to be aligned with You.

You know what they say, if you start random, you end with...

Zoom H4N.

It's A Wrap.

2011-06-26T06:41:00.000-07:00

Every evening, through the headset, someone will utter 3 very special words to me.

That three words brings joy to my heart, and a major sigh of relief.

And yesterday, it was the one final time I heard it.

"It's a wrap."

Yes, it is a wrap. After 19 days of shoot and one month of preparation, it is done.

And that concludes my first narrative production.

14 Hour Days.

2011-06-15T07:23:00.000-07:00

I've been working 18 hours a day.

Really don't know what I'm sustaining on.

Probably adrenaline.

And sugar.

A whole lotta sugar.

Come quickly, July!

My Dad on a 50mm

2011-05-29T06:51:00.000-07:00

Okay, I bluffed. It's not been one month yet.

Hehe.

After many weeks of frantic work, I just felt that I needed to get something. Anything. My impulsive shopping genes were firing on all cylinders.

But I knew I had to control myself, in order to save enough for a small getaway at the end of the whole mega project. So, for now, it was a fight between
1) stash of graphic novels from Amazon.com
2) A new bunch of clothes
3) New spectacles
4) New Canon 50mm lens

Well, if you see the picture above, and my heading, you'll know what I went for. Reading rave reviews about it and seeing that it's easy on the pocket, plus learning that there's a Parisilk store near church which sold it at a wholesale price made it the impulse buy of the month.

In the meantime, I'll be holding my thirst until next next next month, (yes 3 months because that's probably how long I'd need to save for this other tech baby on my list-- and no, it's not an iPad 2, which is on the whole wide world's list.).

Save money, save money!!

Okay bye.

And now, the marathon starts.

2011-05-12T09:53:00.000-07:00

The much anticipated/dreaded production time has come. In two weeks, it will be the YOG period all over again, but much worse. Instead of 12 days, it's now a month. And there's no buffet line and free coke.

So friends, I officially mark this my month long MIA post. All the way to end of June, it will be one heck of a journey to me as I start my first ever TV narrative drama shoot. And I'm eagerly awaiting the things I can learn.

May God watch over me and the production in this intensive period, and friends, keep me in your prayers.

And now, the marathon starts.

The Trees.

2011-05-05T10:08:00.000-07:00

When people start asking, "why do God condone suffering? Isn't He supposed to be good? Why does he allow suffering in this world?" I always get stumped.

However, Justin gave a very good example of the meaning of suffering in tonight's bible study, and I thought I'll share with my 2 readers (who are myself and Yan Yan respectively. Haha.)

Somewhere in Australia there are two types of plantations for a certain tree. A well-grown tree produces very good, solid wood when it matures, oozes fragrant oil and little sap.

One type of plantation is the kind where the planted trees gets watered only when there is rain. Basically, the tree is left to its own defenses, to survive through any elements thrown at it.

The other type of plantation is the kind where the trees are "irrigated", they get a constant supply of water everyday.

After 15 years, the trees which have been irrigated everyday grew to be fat and big, while the former are skinnier when compared.

On cutting through the trees which have been watered regularly, the people who owned the land found that even though the tree was fat, its bark could easily be peeled off and its inside was soft. It is rich in sap, but not in oil.

In the meantime, when forest fires raged through Australia, the trees that grew naturally continue to stand after the fire. Even though the fire stripped the first layer of bark to ashes, the wood inside is good quality hard wood. Oil that was sweet-smelling ooze out from the tree.

You probably understand the lesson behind this story. In order to mold ourselves to be better, we have to go through these hard times. Even without any biblical context, it can still relate to all of us, that suffering is a process we have to go through in order to become faster, stronger, better.

In my opinion, it is a story relevant to a lot of our lives. There are good days, then there are the horrible days.

But at the end, I just want to stand tall with a strong, pumping heart for His Kingdom.

And that is what matters the most.

P.S to tie in with tonight's bible study topic, this post is one of my memorial stones/ark (Joshua 3).

Rallies.

2011-05-03T07:07:00.000-07:00

The pictures below are all taken with an entry level Canon 550D with a standard 135mm lens.

The long jam.

"Chiampion"

A man airs his grievances to a SPP candidate.

Auntie is a hard core supporter.

They want to be seen.

Before the rally begins, an SPP candidate shakes the hand of a supporter.

A crowd gathers on the hill near the stadium to hear the rally.

People mountain people sea.

Mr Chiam starts speaking.

An excited crowd.

The Hammer plush toy.

People.

An ardent supporter.

The crowd watches.

A home-made stick that binds two flags together, an ideology that is quite impossible in the near future.

Rally 2.

2011-05-02T11:12:00.000-07:00

"For the past 27 years, I have won every seat I contested for, and nobody who voted for me has gotten into any trouble."
- Mr Chiam

The crowd at Bishan Stadium.

Once in 6 years.

2011-05-01T11:57:00.000-07:00

A shot from my camera to mark the first rally of my life.

In every victory, let it be said of me, my source of strength, my source of hope, is Christ alone.

2011-04-28T09:24:00.000-07:00

I went back to SRJC yesterday.

It was a coincidence, actually, that my boss wanted me to go down to do a viewing of the place. She said, "I need you to go down to look at a location, it's Serangoon Junior College."

"Oh! My school!" I exclaimed.

And so I went, dutifully in the afternoon. After completing my task, I went to the basketball court to find Ms Rivera to say hi.

It was a really nice feeling to be back. Somewhere familiar, somewhere safe. Even when I was looking around the school hall, I was thinking, hey I took my A Levels here. I walked around the surroundings, and saw the LT5 again. This time, it's in pink, not green as I had fondly recalled.

Every part of the school hold memories dear to me. Especially the basketball court. I looked at the basketball girls who were practicing their shooting and thought to myself, dang, I'm envious. If only I could just join them. But I couldn't, I had to go back to the office.

Well, I guess I'm still adjusting to the working life. Nonetheless, I'd have to say, I thank God for being in this school. I learned so much in there, had so many opportunities to be a leader, and for the first time in my life, this was the school that made me feel like I truly belonged.

What's a school without its teachers? Without Miss Rivera, the single-most important teacher in my life EVER, basketball would never have become such a longstanding passion in my life. She believed in me, and made me believe in myself.

What's a school without its students? I think my JC life was the most happening time of my life. My seniors led me to my first (underage, mind you) clubbing experience. And second, and third. Of course, the classmates mattered too, especially a petite bambi-eyed girl with a extra long Indian name who made the time in class so fun, so ridiculous, but at the same time, so competitive, in a good way. Haha.

I find it really heartwarming to be able to go to the Old Blog (I was in J1 when I started blogging) and read about my time in JC over again. This was my first post. Ever.

"i'm in the school library( again)... and have to wait till 1.30 till Yan Sze comes back so she can play basketball with me. Today,I think I am so bo liao, I don't have anything to say. Hey, wait a minute! I know... I'll talk about Ying Chin!!. Ying Chin is sorely missed by us now that she's in NY. However, I'm quite lucky because I get to see her everyday while waiting for the bus. And I almost laughed my head off when she told me about her "toilet troubles" the other day. You wanna know more about her toilet trouble? Ask her! Haha.. I think she'll kill me. And by the way, you must be curious why i bolded her name. It's by request from the person in question herself. Ying Chin, not only have I typed your names so many times, but this entry is all about U!!! Happy anot? Haha...

Anyway, I had maths in the morning. I really regreted ponning during the last week of school last term. I feel like I can't catch up!! Help!! Luckily, Econs and Chem were repeat lectures, so I had no problem.( but wanted to doze off in the LT though).. hmm...i think i go do something productive now... "

Oh no. I feel so old now! But warm and fuzzy inside.

Ahhh... SRJC, I hope I will turn all challenges to gold*. For you.

*part of our school song. Don't ask.

On Politics.

2011-04-25T07:49:00.000-07:00

I've only got one thing to say about the coming election.

Wong can't sing but he sure can build towns, and build them pretty!

The Night.

2011-04-20T09:49:00.000-07:00

It's 12:56am.

I quite enjoy this time of the night. It's quiet, there's nothing much to do but rest, which I am grateful for. There's nothing to worry about, well, not until tomorrow morning when the work day lingers. But for now, it's my time.

It's also my quiet time with The Man Upstairs. He appears more important than ever, and time spent with Him becomes more precious. Also, with a job that keeps me on my toes everyday, I find that His presence is the only thing so far that's kept me surviving. Plus, the little surprises He plant around the corners at different times really made me thankful.

The cuckoo bird on the clock in the living room just popped out, signaling my bed time and a new work cycle tomorrow.

All is quiet.

And peaceful. It is well.

Watching the World Pass Me By

2011-04-16T08:37:00.000-07:00

2009, just before a 12 hour train journey from Shanghai to Beijing.

My wanderlust is acting up.

Penguin Ball

2011-04-10T07:11:00.000-07:00

"Penguin Ball". That's the weekend.

I find myself only describing my weekends these days. And even so, some weekends are not spent floating in a swimming pool with a drink in my hand (I WISH!), like this weekend, which was spent with the big W. Hint: It's a four letter word.

When my big married sister came over to spend the evening back at home yesterday, I told her, "You're my social life this weekend."

But it was fun. Yes, somehow, not sleeping in the same room after 23 years does wonders for sisters. We talked about a whole truckload of topics, dug out old stuffed toys that boys gave us and laughed at them. For the record, my lil' sister won us in the amount of stuffed toys she received. However, her stuffed toys were not as fun as mine! It was a round pink penguin, which someone had given me about 3 years back. It had a small stain, so when I tried to wash it, the stain became bigger and it was known as the "menstrating penguin" thereafter. But that's another story. The real story is how fun it was.

We started playing Penguin volleyball in the bedroom. Soon, we started heading it and my big sister, with her heavy bosom, chested it like a football. Then we started bounce-passing it, and only stopped after accidentally hitting my lil' sister on the head with it.

No she did not become stupider. It's a stuffed toy.

Yes. Highlight of my weekend was bouncing a "menstrating penguin" toy. Please, friends, don't let me become a loser.

Oh wait-- am I one already?

Kidding lah!

(Had a good weekday stretch of dinners to keep myself sane, so that's good!)

A Simple Song.

2011-04-03T05:52:00.000-07:00

"Yes, Jesus loves me.
Yes, Jesus loves me.
Yes, Jesus loves me.
For the bible tells me so."

It's such a simple song, and when we were younger, it didn't hold much significance. Now, when I sing this song, it can stir up so much in the heart, and it is so reassuring and soothing to know the fact. Jesus loves me, and Jesus loves you too.

Isn't that just so awesome!!!??

Friday, Friday! Gotta Get Down on Friday.

2011-04-01T10:41:00.000-07:00

Friday's here, well, technically, it's Saturday and I'm trying to think of what I can talk about here instead of how the weekend is here again.

Because I see that I have the tendency to do that. And also because the Rebecca Black song is everywhere. But you know, the song really captures my thoughts.

Yesterday was Thursday, Thursday
Today i-is Friday, Friday (Partyin’)
We-we-we so excited
We so excited
We gonna have a ball today

Tomorrow is Saturday
And Sunday comes after...wards
I don’t want this weekend to end

Wish I could sing it out loud- without bursting out in laughter/embarrassment, whichever comes first. And of course, getting all days in a week right.

This song prove one thing- there is hope yet for
1) aspiring not-yet-famous songwriters
2) R&B singers whose songs don't make much sense ("go shortie, it's your birthday" anyone?)
3) Foreigners who massacre the English language ("lucky my breasts are small and humble so you don't mistake them for mountains" in Shakira's Whenever Wherever)
4) English natives who gives weird metaphors ("Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?" in Katy Perry's Firework. Well, do ya? Do ya?)
5) people-who-like-to-sing-about-what-they-are-doing (that's me la).

Ya. Haha.

你好吗？

2011-03-27T07:08:00.000-07:00

我很好。。。这句话应该不是敷衍自己。

很想把自己想得很可怜，可是事实并不是这样。

真的不能一直发牢骚。

要往好的方面想，不然只会害到自己。

已经离开的你好吗？

差一点忘了在生活中的有些人，他们几时进入你的世界，几时离开。

又忘了，他们为什么离开？

和他们相处的日子像个梦，需要绞尽脑汁才能告诉自己，“哦，对。不是梦。”

当然，对某些人，还是会牢牢记得他们的个性。但想念的是他们的为人或纯粹只是那段时光，我也不晓得。

其实，朋友啊，我不应该问“你好吗？”这句话。

因为我们都得向前看。

今天因为做工，所以头脑太累了。

过几个月再问吧。

Commitments

2011-03-22T08:54:00.000-07:00

It seems like someone forshadowed this dilemma. I've seen people deal with this situation before and I truly wondered how they end up with their decisions.

The great big orange ball versus the great big salary machine.

Stacking up two passions against one another. Hardly fair,don't you think?

But the truth is, we only have 24 hours everyday.

And the salary machine has already controlled my weekends.

Now, it's my turn to choose.

It's obvious, but painful. It's obviously painful. Or painfully obvious.

Woe is me.

Hurray for an Off Day.

2011-03-20T20:05:00.000-07:00

It's an off day for me today.

*Insert BIG Smiley*.

Really, really big smiley.

Fishy Business

2011-03-13T07:53:00.000-07:00

I had a chance to watch Fish Leong at a private showcase because my sister had tickets. And for those of you who know me KNOW ME, you know I'm a big fan. I'm a grouper (pun!). I brought Amanda with me because we went blading before that, so "shun pian".

Plus, it was a highlight to my Saturday, which happened to be the only rest day in the midst of work. (Next week no shoot! YEAH!)

We were a tad late, so we missed the first few songs. But we did manage to catch her older hits, such as “可惜不是你” and “崇拜”.

And like always, she can express emotions through her voice so well. Her songs have long been part of my history, ever since I went to her concert in 2007 and was blown away. Every one of her albums remind me of different parts of my life, especially my university life and the segments in between.

I really like her songs. They remind me of Shanghai. And more importantly, reminds me of you, you, and you.

Just Enjoy The Show.

2011-03-04T07:57:00.000-08:00

I had the opportunity to meet her in person!

(And also the opportunity to ask her to move here and there to get the framing right.)

Ahhh... the benefits of working in the media.

That said, it's 2 full days of shooting this weekend.

But then again, I'm kinda excited about it.

And have prepared for it by having a great weekend last week- went blading, watched Lenka's showcase, went refereeing, had a restful Sunday, an Oscar-winning movie and some KOI to end the weekend. All in all, I was in good company.

(Yay! I do have a life!)

In the midst of having almost no weekends to myself this month, I have resolved to make my weekdays my weekends. So, ask me out for dinner if you're in town during the week, will ya?

And don't worry about my resting. I think God takes care of me very well.

In the meantime, watch the video and enjoy the show. I bet you've heard the song before.